Rain Came Pouring Down When I Was Drowning
by snarkysweetness
Summary: How Skye and Ward had a wardrobe change between Providence and The Only Light in the Darkness or rather in which Skyeward totally did the do off-camera and none of us noticed.
**Title:** Rain Came Pouring Down When I Was Drowning
 **Author:** snarkysweetness  
 **Rating:** NC-17  
 **Pairing:** Skye/Ward  
 **Summary:** How Skye and Ward had a wardrobe change between _Providence_ and _The Only Light in the Darkness_ or rather in which Skyeward totally had sex off-camera and none of us noticed.  
 **Warnings:** Smut.  
 **Disclaimer:** I own nothing.  
 **Author's Notes Uno:** I'm not saying this totally happened in canon, I'm just saying that between _Providence_ and _The Only Light in the Darkness_ Skye had changed clothes and was suddenly sans make-up and Grant's hair was super floofy like he'd just washed it and he wasn't covered in blood and dirt anymore. I mean, _maybe_ I'm suggesting that they totally fucked in the shower between the time he came to the base and when he finally got patched up by Simmons. Because, I mean, they _could_ have [wink, wink, nudge, nudge, cry, cry because this totally happened off-screen and I'm upset].  
 **Author's Note Dos:** Chloe also believed they had sex off-camera and even asked the writers about it and all they would tell her is 'maybe' so we can now take this as proof my fic is canon.

Skye's shirt was balled into his fist, her fingers were tangled in his hair, and his name spilled from her lips into his as he pressed her body further into the wall. He wasn't sure what had possessed him to reach for her arm, crush his mouth to hers, and hoist her up against his broken rib's wishes but here they were, going at it like they couldn't be caught at any moment.

He suspected the overprotective girlfriend thing had something to do with it. He wasn't used to being fussed over, to having someone care if he lived or died, and when she started in with the scolding over his injuries it reminded him of how much he loved her.

Plus, seeing as this was the last day he'd have with her he wanted to make it count.

Grant trailed his lips over her jaw as she raked her nails down his scalp and over the back of his neck, sending the good kind of pain down his spine. If she didn't stop that he was going to fuck her right here in this hallway and he was having a hard time remembering the reasons why that was a bad idea.

"Your…ribs…Simmons…oh God, there," Skye moaned when he bit into her pulse point.

"Never thought we'd be doing this and I'd hear you saying Simmons' name," he teased, grinning as his slid a hand up her shirt. "And as hot as that would be to imagine," he whispered, his lips near her ear, "she's not invited." Not that he'd ever share; besides he had no interest in anyone but Skye.

 _Skye biting her lip to keep from calling his name. Skye gripping his sheets. Skye riding him into a state of complete and utter bliss._

His mouth found hers again and he fought to stop the fantasies there. He couldn't afford to think about all of the other things he wanted to do with her. The things that happened outside of the bedroom. Wedding bands. Their joined hands over a stretched-out t-shirt. A little girl with his eyes and her spirit chasing their poor dog around the yard of their cottage.

He couldn't let himself imagine that life, the life they could never have; a life where they could be happy. It was too much. She was too much. She deserved so much more than he could have ever given her.

And he knew being here with her, kissing her like this, was incredibly selfish but he couldn't help himself; but he knew he had to stop.

He reluctantly broke away from her lips and rested his forehead against hers. "I should…" he swallowed hard, his heart pounding so loudly he couldn't hear himself think. The effect she had on him was frightening.

Grant cupped her cheek and traced his thumb across her skin with a smile. God, she was beautiful.

He dreaded seeing the look on her face when she discovered who he really was.

"I should clean up before I let Simmons go into full doctor mode on me," he whispered, lowering his hand and stepping away, trying not to let his sadness show. "Let Coulson know I'm here? I'm just going to stop by the bus, shower to get all of this off, then I'll find you."

"Hey, what's wrong?" Skye whispered, stepping forward to cup his cheek, her eyes filled with worry.

He gave her his best 'I'm fine' smile and leaned down to kiss the top of her head.

"I'm just exhausted, it's been a long few days."

Skye smiled up at him and got on her toes to place a feather of a kiss on his lips. "Come on," she whispered, taking his hand and leading him towards the hangar. "You don't know your way around," she said before he could protest and while he was sure he could figure it out he didn't want to set off her suspicions.

Besides, this wasn't about the mission. He knew if he spent too much time alone with her he'd cross a line he'd never come back from. He'd do his best to get her to unlock that hard drive but he wasn't going to seduce her to do it. If he did…if they…

Well, it wouldn't be because of his fucking mission.

As soon as she stubbornly helped him up the stairs and into the bus' living quarters she started fussing over him again. "Have you eaten? There's a kitchen inside the base but there should still be something-" Grant cut her off with a kiss, finding her both adorable and frustrating.

"I'm fine," he promised, kissing her nose before she could argue with him again. "I promise I'll be in, out, and down to see Simmons before you know it."

Skye 'hmphed' and disappeared into his bunk to get him a change of clothes.

Grant sighed and headed for the shower, knowing she wasn't going to let him be. He was just going to have to ignore his raging boner with her in the next room.

 _Fine_.

He'd be fine.

The moment she creeped up on him in the bathroom and touched his shoulder he knew he wasn't going to be fine.

He jumped in surprise and turned to find her chewing on her lip nervously and he _knew_ ; he was so stupid and cocky to think he would ever be the one doing the seducing.

"You're going to need help, because of that rib," she whispered, locking the door closed behind her and stepping closer to tug at the bottom of his shirt.

He couldn't speak, he was too busy trying to remember when he'd died because this couldn't be real. He was dead and this was some sort of death dream because this didn't happen, not to him. She was too good, too…

Grant grasped her face between his hands and met her eyes, wishing he could regret loving her. It would be easier if he didn't, better for her, but he couldn't; loving her was the only good thing he'd ever done in his life and he couldn't regret that or her.

"Skye…I…" He'd never been good at this. At feelings. At opening up. Somehow she brought it out of him but there were no words to tell her what she meant to him so he decided to show her instead.

This kiss was different than their others. It wasn't because they could die, because he couldn't control himself, because they'd missed each other. It was tender in a way he didn't know he could master but also good enough that he wasn't sure if the whimpers filling the room came from her or from him.

"Grant, you're hurt," she reminded, breaking the kiss and doing nothing but giving him an opening to assault her neck with his mouth.

"You're worth it," he insisted, trailing his hands over her sides so he could slip off her shirt.

Skye gazed up at him with a look that could only be described as love, sending butterflies fluttering through his stomach. He kissed her again, holding her face in his hands as he backed her into the small shower. Her nimble fingers made quick work of ridding him of his pants and he couldn't kick them off fast enough. His heart raced as he watched her undress, her beauty taking his breath for a moment. She was perfect in every way and he still couldn't believe she was letting down her guard and allowing him in like this.

She reached for him again, her big eyes staring up at him nervously while she gnawed on her lower lip. He couldn't help but smile at the knowledge that he wasn't the only one who wanted this so badly. And she wasn't the only one who was nervous; he'd wanted this and her for so long. He couldn't mess this up now.

Using his body to shield hers from the cold water he pressed her against the wall, slipping his tongue even further her mouth. Skye trailed her fingertips along his face, moaning quietly as he slid his hands between their bodies. Finding her clit he pressed his thumb against it, stroking it lightly while gliding his fingers between her folds. Skye's breath hitched and a pitchy moan left her lips as she gripped his shoulders, arching her back to be closer to him.

A sharp pain shot through his ribs he realized he hadn't fully thought this through: but that didn't stop him from dipping his head lower to kiss her harder. So what if he cracked another rib? Punctured a lung? At least he'd die getting to be inside of her just once.

Once the water warmed to an acceptable degree Grant spun her around and pulled her against his chest, letting his head back so they could both soak under the shower head. Grant gently pushed her hair to the side and kissed his way along her neck. One hand gripped her waist and the other resumed its earlier activities.

She leaned back and turned her head, finding his lips again. She entwined one arm around his neck and pulled him closer, using her teeth to torture his bottom lip. Grant grew harder and sighed, realizing he had no idea how they were supposed to do this.

What an idiot; he should have skipped the shower and taken her to his bunk. How was he supposed to get on his knees with a broken rib to taste her the way he'd dreamed about for months? Or hoist her up and fuck her the way she deserved?

 _So stupid_!

"Skye," he whispered, pulling away from her so he could grab the soap. Maybe he couldn't actually fuck her, but that wouldn't stop him from enjoying this.

She plucked the soap from his hand and shook her head. "Let someone take care of you for once," she scolded, leaning up to kiss him quickly before running the bar over his sore shoulders. His pride wanted to argue with her; in all of his fantasies he was the one catering to her. But his body was very much enjoying the feeling of her hands. By the time all of the blood and dirt made its way down the drain he was completely at her mercy. He didn't even try to stop her when she fell to her knees and with her eyes never leaving his took him into her mouth.

Grant leaned back, tangling a hand in her hair. She was amazing; sure, she was working his dick like a pro but that wasn't it. She was just…he sighed happily. He fucking loved her and if he ever saw her again she would know the truth and hate him.

Remembering their reality he snapped out of his sex haze and pulled her to her feet. Before Skye could argue with him they were kissing again and this time he ignored every protest his body made. The pain would go away but if he wasted his last few moments with her he would never forgive himself.

"Grant!" She cried when he pinned her to the wall and hoisted her up enough to enter her. He held her there for a moment, his forehead pressed against hers, and fought back the urge to cry. He still couldn't speak the words so he kissed her slowly, his thrusts matching the pace. So maybe this wasn't perfect like he'd planned, but judging by the way she dug her fingers into his arms, she wasn't complaining.

He came with a painful groan; his body angrily protesting his actions. Skye ran her fingers through his hair, kissing his face. He realized he'd began to shed tears and Skye began whispering apologies, blaming herself for his disregard for his own injuries.

"Don't be; I love you," he whispered without thinking. None of this was her fault; she was blameless in everything. He was the villain and soon she would wish she'd made him suffer a little more.

Skye stared up at him, her eyes wide. She opened her mouth but the lights flickered and the water shut off and Grant realized they're been in here so long the generator was going.

"Crap," Skye muttered, realizing the others had surely noticed their absence.

Grant set her back down and once again ignored his broken rib to grab two towels so they could dry off quickly before someone came looking for them and found them together. He didn't doubt Coulson would kill him over Skye's honor and he was kicking himself for letting things go so far.

He could never regret getting the chance to make love to her and tell her how he felt but he knew it was wrong; she deserved better than the heartbreak he was going to inflict on her when he left again. This time for good.

There was no scenario in which they would ever be happy.

He was just a selfish prick who had to be with her, consequences be damned.

"Let me help," Skye offered, interrupting his brooding thoughts. She gave him a small smile, holding up his pants and he pulled her against his chest, kissing her hard on the mouth. Kissing her goodbye.

"I'll go first; we both know what Coulson will do to me if he finds us."

Her eyes twinkled with amusement and she smiled. "I don't know, it might be fun to watch you try to explain what we were doing in here."

Fuck; he was going to miss her.

Once they were dressed he went for the door but she stopped him with another kiss, her lips lingering against his. "Don't forget you owe me a drink and a talk." She met his eyes, her expression warning that he wasn't going to get off that easily.

Grant smirked and brushed his thumb across her cheek. "And here I thought 'let's have that drink' wasn't you offering to have sex with me."

"If you weren't already broken I'd hit you," she warned, fighting a smile.

Grant leaned down and kissed her again. He held her close, not wanting to let her go. Panic coursed through his chest. He wasn't ready to do this. He loved her too much. How had he let things get this far?

"I promise, we'll have that drink," he said as he pulled away, taking one long, final glance at her before forcing himself to open the door. If he stayed here with her, he would never leave. And if he didn't return to John with the hard drive he knew what would happen to Skye. Grant was a monster, but he refused to let any further harm come to her.

Grant made it all the way to the staircase before she called after him.

"I love you too."

He froze, desperately wanting to go back to her, to tell her everything. But logic told him it would do nothing but put her in more danger.

Instead he glanced back at her, doing his best to mask his sadness. "I'll see you downstairs, sweetheart."

Skye gave him a warm smile and he turned away from her. From his future. From anything that could bring him happiness. He owed John a debt and he couldn't walk away now. Not from his sins. Not even for her. Because if he did, if he followed his heart, John would kill her. So to save her life he walked away from the only person he'd ever loved and the pain in his chest was far worse than every broken bone in his body.


End file.
